lost joy

Let me tell you about a girl named "Joy".  A girl named Joy who says she doesn't feel very Joyful.  After all, it's not her real name, it's her "English name", one she gave herself. She leads a quiet life at a local bookstore, where she helps foreigners find their favorite reads on their vacations.  Although she works in a bookstore, she has never read the Scriptures, never seen the point.   She doesn't talk to their Author or ask Him for help. When I ask her why not, her feelings shine through more: "What He ever do for me??" she says, "I lose my muddah, my faddah, my sisdah, my bruddah. I got no-ting" She doesn't go to the fellowships around town either.  She only hears them say that she has to pay her way into the Life after this one and that to be forgiven all you have to do is say you're "sorry" and "forgive me". She's tried, and it just feels empty to say those words over and over again.  She sits just inches away from little booklets like "Anyone can go to Heaven, Just be Good!" that only seem to add to the burden.  She doesn't feel "good"... in fact, she can't seem to get rid of the guilt and shame she feels over her past mistakes, no matter how hard she tries, or how many times she says "I'm sorry". She doesn't consider herself to be a "good" Buddhist...or a bad Buddhist.  Honestly, she's not really sure what she believes, but knows she doesn't believe in the One who came to die for her.  She knows He and the buddha are different, but she's not sure how or why.  Since she doesn't plan on talking to Him, as I leave I tell her that I will intercede on her behalf. Her eyes brighten just a little at the thought of help from above.


Maybe...just maybe...she saw something in my eyes that looked "different", maybe she sees compassion, or "the Light in my eyes". Maybe our short conversation will motivate her to seek Him with all her heart...maybe.

At the annual conference in Thailand, I heard for the first time that He gives us new names: "you will be called by a new name which the mouth of the Father will designate", "...and I will give [her] a white stone, and a new name written on the stone which no one knows but [her] who receives it".  Maybe, I'll never see Joy again.  But I know the name she's given herself and can intercede for her by name. I also know Someone I can ask to give her a new name. And I, for one, hope it's still "Joy".... "Joy Everlasting".